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Monologue Jokes – April 16, 2013
1. On Monday, Arkansas lawmakers rejected a compromise measure that would have extended health insurance to more of its low-income citizens, or, as they are more commonly known in Arkansas, people who...
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September 19, 2014 – Monologue Jokes
1. Yesterday, Larry Ellison, the world’s fifth richest person, worth $51 billion, announced he is retiring as CEO of Oracle, the company he founded in 1977. Ellison decided to step down when he...
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January 27, 2015 – Monologue Jokes
1. A drone crashed landed on the White House lawn early Monday morning. “Good to know I’m not the only robotic droid who failed to make all the way to the White House,” said Mitt Romney. 2. According...
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March 5, 2015 – Monologue Jokes
1. The Arizona Diamondbacks announced on Tuesday they play to sell a Churro Dog which consists of a warm cinnamon churro sitting inside a glazed chocolate donut, topped with frozen yogurt and caramel...
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April 27, 2015 – Monologue Jokes
1. The in-house investigators assigned to look into Brian Williams’ past reports have documented at least 10 instances of exaggerations and embellishments. Even worse, before Williams reported on the...
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June 3, 2015 – Monologue Jokes
1. AOL launched a new homepage yesterday. So expect a panicked call from your parents. “My email’s missing!!!!” 2. Sepp Blatter stunned the world of soccer yesterday by unexpectedly resigning as FIFA...
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July 21, 2015 – Monologue Jokes
1. On Monday, gold prices plunged more than 4 percent to a new five-year low. As a result, King Midas has gone back to stripping. 2. Last week, Intuit, the makers of TurboTax, told users they have...
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September 14, 2015 – Monologue Jokes
1. Republican front-runner Donald Trump said on Sunday, high salaries paid to CEOs were a “joke” and were often approved by company boards stacked with the CEO’s friends. Just a reminder, this is...
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December 9, 2019 – Monologue Jokes
1. A Florida woman who thought she was buying a baby bouncer from a local Goodwill as a baby shower present was surprised to find a loaded rifle in the box instead. But, since it was Florida, it was...
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